Let’s face it guys; there exists games with things that you take pleasure in when you shouldn’t. Sometimes it’s a small feature, and sometimes it’s the entire game. This small list of games has features that I personally take pleasure in, even when I know I shouldn’t.
What? This was a terribly written intro? Whatever. I just finished speed writing this article and I’ve been staring at this for 20 minutes. I need to move on, so get off my back, bro.
5: Bot Fights in Warcraft 3: Frozen Throne
There’s a reason why Starcraft became competitive while Warcraft didn’t; the combat is slower and unrefined, and unit balancing was poor. So why play Warcraft 3 at all? Because it was still fun. A different set of units and buildings was a nice change from Starcraft, the Hero system was ballin’, and fighting off the forest baddies ANd your opponents was enjoyable. Although there’s still a small online community, sometimes I just don’t feel like logging on to play a game and actually strategizing against a human opponent. Mindless comp stomping gives me my quick Warcraft 3 fix, and it’s just unexplainably fun for me. Co-op comp stomping is a small activity at my LAN parties, and I boot up WC3 to smack around a few bots ever once in a while as a small emotional pick-me-up; a tiny “I feel a little better now” for casual days.
…Warcraft 4 please..?
4: Launching Teammates and Anchor Punching In Lost Planet 2
Lost planet 2 focused heavily on co-op and, in my opinion, did a very nice job with it. The plot was definitely nothing as good as Lost Planet 1, but the gameplay was better by a milestone. LP2 offers New weapons, new Vital Suits, and new Akrid galore. With all of these features, it’s important to use teamwork to get past obstacles, especially in hard mode. But sometimes, you get that satanic urge. Somebody crosses you in some way. You feel the devilish rush of delinquency arc up your back and into your finger, and you do it; mash the anchor button ’till your partners stumble across the room. You run up to the teammate that just stole your heavy weapon ammo and slap him with a Gunsword, shield Rocket Launcher the AFk friend off of the train, and VS kick the guy running for cover. Why? For the sake of universal balance. Chaos must balance order to achieve harmony, so I give my fellow snow pirates a good anchor punch if I feel that it’s necessary. I know I shouldn’t; in fact, I work well with other online and split-screen. Sometimes, though, I just gotta give in, and it feels so good. Oh so good.
3: Naming Your Travelers After Your Friends in Oregon Trail 2: Deluxe Edition
This one’s gonna be quick. Watching the random girl “Martha” get mauled by a mountain lion and die of infection is a lot less funny that watching your friend get mauled and die, and you know for a fact that it’s true. I have only played one game of OT2 with random names, and none of them have been funnier than using my friends’ names as the travelers. When you’ve got guests over, try it. It’s guaranteed to crush a lung or three.
To Jacob and Alana: I had no idea how you dehydrated next to a river. I had 6 canteens, so I’m blaming your incompetency on that one.
2: Knowing I Could Be Doing Something Productive While I Play Minecraft
Minecraft: the Ultimate time killer. Perfect for knocking a few hours off of your day….
…unless you have things to do. School work, going to work, household chores, and peer relationships all fall to the powerful might of Minecraft’s time-killing powers. Your 5 page report due tomorrow is pushed aside by the powerful urge of building a new log cabin and check on your cactus farm. I’ve missed many a high school assignment by branch mining. Get-togethers were skipped because I needed steak, eating dinner was pushed back behind making glass, and laundry was not washed on time because my houses needed an interior overhaul.
And not a single fuck was given in any circumstance.
1: Everything About Final Fantasy X-2
I’m honestly ashamed to own this game. The series’ first true sequel was considered by many to be mediocre, so many people think lowly of this game. The plot was lackluster, the Dressphere system was awkward, and the “girly” theme was awkward, even for many females that I know who’ve played the game. Combat reverted to the Active Time Battle system unlike Final Fantasy X, which had mixed reactions, and the mission system made for awkward story progression.
But I. Fucking. Loooove it.
The soundtrack is catchy as fuck, the graphics are good for PS2 standards, the missions made the game non-linear to an extent, the Dressphere system made party builds dynamic and adjustable, and it’s just enjoyable to me. I love the main trio, ESPECIALLY RIKKU BECAUSE ADORABLE. The Dressphere changing scenes and the fact that I love all of their outfits make me question my masculinity to an extreme degree, and partially due to this, I do not store this game in plain sight (in fact, I smush it as close as possible to Final Fantasy X in my PS2 storage bag) due to its deadly social stigma. Even if I’m ashamed to own and play this game, I still play it multiple times a year. I just don’t give anyone a heads up, so I can quest in safety and not risk a public stoning or three.
Final Fantasy X-2: my ultimate guilty pleasure game. I’m going to gaming hell for this, and I’m okay with it.